This is Lindsey Stirling. I love her. Give the song a listen before we continue, and check out the lyrics while you do.
Gave it a good listen? That is what doing the work in therapy feels like. It’s frightening. It’s not at all fun. And it’s the self-realization that helps the most. My newest therapist, and I say newest because she is my most recent, though I’ve been seeing her since around last November, recommended a book to me back when the trust between us was more tenuous than a spider’s thread. Only a few weeks ago did I begin reading this book, called Healing the Child Within. So far it is well worth the read, though it is more difficult emotionally than I’d like. Frankly, many things are.
I tend to intellectualize my emotions. No, sadly that doesn’t make me a Vulcan, just a Human with a tendency to overthink thinks and under-feel them. So I’m on an interesting journey, learning to feel. I no longer want to pirouette in the dark. I’m tired of having a mechanical heart. It’s time to shatter. Time to fly.